Five years ago, if someone would have told me I would be living in a house with all boys, I would have told them ‘I hope not!’ It is not that I never wanted a son. But, for the sake of being honest, I knew (or was naïve enough to think I knew) that I would be able to live without a son. A daughter, on the other hand, that is something I couldn’t fathom living without. Who would be my lifelong best friend? Who would go with me on shopping trips while my husband went off to do boy things. That relationship I had with my mother was something that I knew I needed for myself.
Due to these feelings, I also constantly joked that I would end up being the one person in our families that ended up birthing all of the boys. And guess what, that is exactly what happened. I am rocking the boy mom status, and there is a very good chance that these two boys are the only children we will have. And the thing that I want everyone to know, is that I could not be luckier or more humbled than I am to have been blessed with sons.
I am as guilty as everyone else when it comes to the preconceived notions about boys and girls. Before having kids of my own, I also felt a bit of, dare I say, sympathy for people when they found out they would be having a boy. I mean, they just aren’t as precious to dress up, and they couldn’t possibly be as sweet and adorable as a little girl. And then I myself became a mom of not one, but two little boys. Suddenly I was on the receiving end of those comments and sad looks that I had in the past given to others. I felt so ashamed that I ever could have looked at a mother of boys and felt as if she were someone to be pitied, that she was missing out on something. That I felt sorry for her. I could not have been more wrong. I am constantly told I need to have another baby, because I would be such a good girl mom. I am told that I really need to experience one of each. But do you know what this all implies, regardless of the intention behind those words? That my boys aren’t enough, when in fact, they are everything and more.
What I wish others (and myself) knew about being a mom of all boys is that you will never be short on love. I am the number one girl to not only my husband, but to two precious little boys who adore me. I get to see them be rough and tough, covered in mud and sweat, but then soak in their sweetness as I snuggle my youngest and watch him drift off to sleep, or when I lay in bed with my toddler and listen to him talk and giggle, amazed at the new things he is constantly learning. I get to experience so many new things that, as a self proclaimed girly-girl, I grew up avoiding. I am a better person because of the job I have been given in raising these boys. I burst with excitement when I see a tractor or a train, because I know I will point it out to my babies and they will be over the moon. We sing silly songs. We have dance parties. We do all of the things I dreamed of doing with daughters, yet it is just as sweet with my boys. In fact, I think it is special on such a deep level because, as their mama, I see such a gentle and precious side of them that is not so obvious in boys, that even when they are grown, I have a feeling will still be there.
I have the honor and privilege of shaping my boys into men. Men that will treat others with kindness and respect, that will hopefully be amazing husbands and fathers themselves. The love I feel when looking at them is something that cannot be explained or comprehended.
Do not pity us boy moms. I would never close the door on a daughter. But what having boys has taught me is that each and every child is their own person, and at the end of the day, a person is a person. They have their own little soul, their own thoughts and feelings, and my heart beats for each of my boys every single day. Looking back, I was so uncertain of how I could ever live without a daughter, and yet I never considered that I couldn’t live without the exact children that I have. Having boys is the greatest blessing I have received that I never knew I needed. Moms of boys have a hidden understanding with one another, because we know that while people think we may be missing out on something, we know that that belief could not be anymore untrue. Being a parent is an honor and a gift, and some of us just so happen to end up with boys. Those messy little boys who tear apart my living room and track mud through the carpet? Yeah, I think I’ll keep them.
Linking up with Annie today.